BBB

A friend emailed me this...

" just read your latest entry... achually, being the kai xing guo is really important! i dont know how to explain it to you from a guys perspective. but guys, being egoistical and hunters, they like to solve problem by themselves. and when they look for solutions, guys being guys, they cant multi task. so they will focus more attention on problem solving. be patient. cos guys really need that pillar of support. dont think being a happy go lucky fruit is being useless! it takes quite a bit of time for a guy to open up his worries to his close buddies... let alone his girlfriend. plus you're that kinda girl who dont like guys to complain too much mah... he probably knows it. thus, not sharing with you."

I pretty much understand and know all this cos I read.. the Allan and Barbara Pease book (I highly recommend!!)

I guess that's why I'm controlling the urge to pester him to tell me his problems and what he is doing so that I can help and stuff like that. I think every woman has problems with this... cos most women have this motherly streak, and they spend their time correcting or "helping" their husbands and then their children. And I'm beginning to see how it affects the relationship...

Husband: (Talking to himself) Hmm I wonder why...
Wife: (Overhearing busybody) why what?
Husband: (Startled) Oh... nothing...
Wife: Tell me la, maybe I can help.
Husband: No it's ok I can manage...
Wife: Two heads are better than one.
Husband: Nah you go do your stuff I'll be fine.
Wife: (getting irritated and louder) Why can't you just tell me? I might know!
Husband: (exasperated) Nono it's just a small thing...
Wife: Are you trying to say I'm stupid?
Husband: Why can't you just leave me alone?!
Wife: FINE
(and you know what happens when women say FINE and stomp off)

So like I said I'm trying to adapt to this... But I like to listen to things and be part of his life... even when I'm not actively in it. I like to hear complaining (unlike what my fren mentioned). I want to... so that I feel like I'm part of all that. But if my solutions are not welcomed then I'll keep my mouth shut.

No wonder Bimbos who are materialistic are always well liked by men. haha they just need to spend money and will never ask what's wrong.